4 Reasons Why People Cheat

 

2 Minute Read

 

As a shift away from the typical themes of betrayal and being undervalued in a relationship - where one has been at the receiving end of infidelity - this opinion piece attempts to consider the power of cheating, from the perspective of the cheater.

 

Viewing cheating as something powerful is quite unorthodox. Especially since the action itself entails so many psychologically harmful consequences. However, just like any behavior individuals engage in to maintain a sense of safety, as well as defending the weakest parts of themselves, cheating is, in one way, a gain of power. Here are a few viewpoints on this:

 

 

Freedom

 

As a desperate attempt to cling onto one's identity, free from their partner, cheating may be used as a form of self-liberation. This is true, perhaps, for people who have felt invisible in their relationship. It may also be true for those who were made to feel that without their partner's existence they would be 'nothing'. 

 

 

 

Reputation

 

The clout bought about by being known as a man or woman who can achieve any, or almost any person they desire, could be another reason for cheating. This reason for cheating could be motivated by an individual's need for a sense of competency or purpose, as well as, the need to feel important. 

 

 

 

Self-worth

 

Although a person may have a loving partner at home, and perhaps the intimacy is satisfying, cheating may provide one with a temporary filler to an insatiable sense of poor self-worth. This may be a particular problem when individuals attempt to fill a void, instead of psychologically working on broken parts of themselves. Simply, knowing that someone wants you and sees you as a value creates a temporary high that through cheating begins a never-ending chase to fill. 

 

 

 

Self-sabotage

 

When in fear of being at the mercy of someone's hands, especially if you have been cheated on before, abandoned, or lost a partner due to death, self-sabotage may be used as a means of taking back the power from chance or an imagined undesired outcome. Cheating here becomes a way of keeping power so that the anxiety surrounding the foreseeable or possible future can be avoided- no matter how unrealistic this could be.  

 

 

 

The aforementioned points about the power of cheating can be interchangeable, as well as coexisting. Despite the power cheating may allow an individual to experience, working on underlying psychological issues is likely to gain a more balanced result.  

 

 

 

 

Picture by: Matheus Bertelli

 

Centered Consciousness